Not That Kind of Girl

Another hungry night without wings and fries, just me and my new book "Not That Kind of Girl" by Lena Dunham. I would say most of my months been efficiently well-spent with a "Quaker" mode without my frequent presence in social media and event. Shortly, I look unnoticeable. I thought, weeks without being able to reached were the worst but not to mention nights in a silence either.

Well, keenly observed that it's just the struggle about growing up. It's been nearly 5 months of wonderful and intense marriage–pregnancy life! but just to brief you earlier that I'm not going to update about my whole day sickness anyway. Sawry!

Last weekend, this girl just had her first remarkable presentation after 3 months of super lengthy and bizarre hibernation. I was invited as the only woman among those gentlemen of honour to become a keynote speaker presenting about "How to be a Hijab Fashion Blogger". Link to poster here.

T was super enthusiast! me? took 2 days to agreed and examined if I might fainting or puke in public. In fact is not easy to convince yourself in a room full of students, experts, and men twice my age with exceptional capability in Entrepreneurship. Most of all, having the guts that your so called insightful story about make-up, dresses, and ootd deserve to be told.

Exploring my fear to prevent my self from failing, I suddenly remembered that I really never post anything which is (maybe) confidently beneficial for you. Let say, I don't even master things such as conturing jawline, drawing an eyeliner, how to take an ootd with a worthy angle, or how to correct your height flaw with the right heels. Then, those sponsored hijab tutorial video I've done, or product review I've posted should be something about hows the product going in my skin. Not in purpose to correct and polish your–already–graceful preview. It's also inspiring to read those bloggers and influencers review about skin care product, make up and tips.. Cause the power of sharing is what we sell here, hello!. But as for me, I don't have the capability to do that yet tho.

If you think I am boring then you are right–I'm an old soul.

I doubt that I don't have the passion to share about how I do make-up–I don't even fill my upper lips.

I am afraid I cannot show you how to wear an evening look since I mostly ended up looking preppy all the time–I dress to express not to impress.

I didn't always get most liked picture–I value content not number.

I found that having dialogue with T, relatives, and family are more rewarding than juggling with errors in comment and an intense update of what beauty should be define in today society. I think I am just trying to be honest with filtering every post in my blog cause what I've seen in social media like Instagram aren't all real.

Shortly, I can't present any of my beauty tips among hundred of student while 50% of them are male with type of species: high level of criticism. I need them to appreciate my speech unconditional with strong level of respect. Then topic about "Personal Branding" should settle the gender issues.

Personal branding is relates to our daily life not only for me as a blogger, but individually and collectively as a mass living product. My presentation somehow reminds me to make peace and start to love my self as a whole person not as a particular object which determine by society orientation since I love how I mostly wrote random things just to share that I am failing, nuanced, and imperfect.

But I always feel relieved afterward. I love how I shared how achieving scholarship shaken my mentality, hilarious friendship between girls, nights of long decision making and mostly quotes  just to brighten my day. I just feel like influence my self through my chicken-writing yet delivering you a story of my not-so appealing caption. But, hey! In every of milestone equals our completion. Yap! because I feel like growing up with you. 

I recognise even Allah says in (Al-Ahzab:21)

"Indeed in the Messenger of Allah (Muhammad ) you have a good example to follow for him who hopes in (the Meeting with) Allah and the Last Day and remembers Allah much".

What is not to be follow? Be happy for every personal touch you had write, organize, and give to others in your life. We are completely blessed with the gift of positive potential. Set your goal high, be glad for every ups and downs, and celebrate that self-acceptance is the most essential of all. I believe that it's not a dream to live in a society with positive personal branding. If you can empower your good image to other, then you should be greater than your brand. Remember to value your self cause not everything that shines is gold.

Now off to bed! I loveeeeee you all. May the one-of-a-kind be with you.

Much love! | Thata